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Things about flying that make me RAGE


I love flying, it’s the fastest and easiest way for me to get from Salt Lake City to Beaumont. At under 5 hours most times it’s a really convenient and awesome way to travel.

That said, there are some things that people do that make me want to rent a car and drive the 24+ hours to get home…

Before the flight

Check In

When you first get to the airport, if you haven’t checked in already you have to go to the check-in kiosk so you can check yourself in, get your boarding pass, and check your bags in. That’s not too hard. It says it in the itinerary and it says it on the many signs in the checkout area. Yet there are always a good 4 or 5 people in the baggage check-in line who decided that they were going to skip that step and just run to the baggage check-in line. So now I’m standing in a line that should be 3 or 4 people shorter, and now those people are going to hold up the line so that they can be checked in. So instead of a check-in process that takes 5-10 minutes, I’m standing in line for 20+ minutes because some people can’t read…

Security

The only thing that’s more annoying then retards at check-in, are retards at the security checkpoint. Now, the TSA was nice enough to put their guidelines on what they will allow on the plane on the internet, on signs scattered around the airport, and on your itinerary, so then why is it such a shock when they say that you can’t bring a water bottle full of some blue liquid into the airport? After the crotch bomber tried to I dunno, BLOW UP A F*&%ING PLANE with some liquid he brought on a plane, I would think that it would be common sense that liquids will probably not be allowed on the plane. Another thing that really annoys me, is how hard it is for people to understand the concept of: “No Metal through the metal detector. It will go off”. I’ve had to watch people go through the detector 3 or 4 times to take off each and every piece of jewelry that they have on their person. When they said to REMOVE ALL METAL OBJECTS FROM YOU, they meant to remove ALL METAL OBJECTS. Jesus! How hard is that to understand? They mean to take off your watch, your belt, your necklace, you rings, your glasses, etc. They didn’t say to remove a single metal object and that they’ll let you through for being a good sport. This is a different day and age, people are trying to KILL US, and so the least you could do is make the process of keeping people from killing us easier by paying attention or at least cooperating…

During the Flight

If the check-in and security part of flying hadn’t already pissed me off, I still have the entire 4 hour flight home to aggravate me…

Kids

Now don’t get me wrong, I love kids. I love hanging out with them, playing with them, being retarded around them, etc. Just don’t bring your infant on the plane. Please. It’s a guaranteed fact that your infant is going to cry for at least an hour during the flight, and you won’t be able to console it because it’s ears are popping and it doesn’t like that at all. Now this isn’t a problem for me when the child isn’t near me, but my patience is really tested when I have a kid right next to me screaming it’s head off so loudly that I can hear it through my headphones on max. There has been a time where it was so bad that I wanted to flip out like this guy:

Personally, I think that airlines should have a soundproof section at the back of the plane for people with kids. That way the kids can be as unhappy as they want, without disturbing anyone else.

People who sleep on the flight

One thing I have found particularly annoying, are people who sleep on the flight like they’re in a Tsar sized bed. Oh they get so comfortable reclining and putting their head on the headrest and then snoring so loudly that I can hear them through my headphones. In some instances I’ll even have an almost case where my shoulder is their pillow, with their mouth in my ear…and nose.

I hate those people…this is an airplane, not a Holiday Inn. If you want to sleep, sleep like you’re on a plane dammit. I can deal with your snoring, but please keep yourself in your seat. I don’t want to smell your breath, or have you drooling all over my shoulder. It’s not pleasant and I’m not white enough not to punch you in your face if you do it for too long.

People who use their phones on the plane

I’m already nervous enough about flying, but nothing makes me want to throw a person out of the nearest emergency exit then some moron using their phone on the plane. On my last flight home I got to sit next to a charming couple who were making calls on their phones while the plane was in flight. WHY!? I screamed in my head. WHY ENDANGER YOUR LIFE FOR A F$(KING PHONE CALL!? I wanted to just grab their phones and stomp on them until there was no chance of salvaging them. It certainly didn’t help when we hit a little turbulence and the plane shuttered a bit. If you use your phone on the plane. I hate you. I hate you a lot. Nothing is so important that you need to endanger everyone’s lives. Nothing. If the FAA thinks that phones pose enough of a risk to ban their use during a flight, then maybe you should follow their rules. I’d sure hate to die in a plane crash because some retard wanted to call their cats to let them know that they were coming home…

Someone just HAAAD to call home huh…

When the plane has landed

Well once the plane has landed you would think that the agony would be over? Hahahahaha! Of course not silly! By this point I’m very impatient because I want to get the hell of of the plane. I want to get off so I can go to the nearest bar and drown myself in the stiffest root-beer they have, but first I have to wait for everyone in front of me to get off of the plane. Something I never understood, was why people will wait until the last minute to do something when they know that they have to do something. I’ve watched people fumble with their bags when all they had to do is get their bag while everyone else was getting off the plane. I also know that the bag isn’t too heavy to just hold in your lap because it’s a FREAKING CARRY ON. Yet, I still have to wait on these people to figure out how to open the overhead bin and then fumble with their 10 pound bag…

I think I’m driving next time…

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About boringtechie

Hello, I'm the boring techie! So you've landed yourself on this site due to me or someone else linking you here, and you're wondering: "What does this kid do, and why should I even care?" Right? Of course you are. Basically, I'm a Techie, though I'm not as boring as the title says, that's one of those things where the word means the opposite of what's REALLY going on... Anyway, I write tuts and make commentaries. That's about it...

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